What Is Christ Centered Counseling

How to Give Biblical Hope with Practical Help.

In this Lesson we will end The Berean Call series and direct our attention to biblical counseling. We will take a look at the qualifications, responsibilities, and goals of a Christ Centered Counselor. We will then offer an insight to Practical Counseling and present some “how to’s “ of Christian Counseling. First let’s join our guests at The Berean Call.

This last video is a brief summary of The Berean Call series,

“Psychology and the Church” and runs about 3 minutes.



Well now we can see the differences in counseling theories and styles. Did you realize how much the psychology profession has influenced the 21st century church? That is why we at CCASN believe that 1000’s of men and women like yourself should become educated and equipped to impact your communities with the saving Grace and Power of the Holy Spirit.

I like what June Hunt of Hope For the Heart Ministries http://www.hopefortheheart.org/ says in her book “Counseling Through Your Bible Handbook” This is an excellent resource to have in your library and I highly recommend it. Visit their website for a complete list of valuable products that will help equip you for the “mission field” of Christ Centered Addiction Counseling.

She states, “Everyone has sincere opinions, but opinions aren't always right. In fact, we've all been sincere...and been sincerely wrong! That is why you should ask, What is my foundation for truth? The Bible should be your foundation. If your thinking doesn't line up with God's thinking, then change your thinking! Isaiah 40:8 says, "The grass withers and the flowers fall, but the word of our God stands forever."

WHAT IS BIBLICAL COUNSELING?

When people come to you for counsel, what are the basic principles and approaches you need to know to pull them out of the ditch and guide them onto the Road to Transformation? First, make a commitment that your counsel be biblical. The starting point is stated in 1 Kings 22:5: "First seek the counsel of the LORD."

Counseling is help and hope given by one knowledgeable person to another person or group. The counsel given can range from personal comfort and encouragement'! with general advice and guidance, to a group crisis intervention. We are called by God not only to "carry each other's burdens," but also to "encourage one another and build each other up" (Galatians 6:2; 1 Thessalonians 5:11).

Biblical counseling means that you rely on truths from the Word of God as you seek to give wise counsel. Hebrews 4:12 says, "The word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it pen­etrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart."

Christ-centered counseling is giving advice, encouragement, and hope to others based on biblical truth while relying on Christ to provide the power for change. Second Corinthians 5:17 says, "If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new" (NK]V).

WHAT QUALIFIES YOU TO OFFER BIBLICAL COUNSEL?

If you are in a growing relationship with God, and...

-You have personally sought and received the comfort of God (2 Corin­thians 1:3-4).

-You love Christ and care about the needs of others (Galatians 6:2).

-You accurately handle the Word of truth (2 Timothy 2:15).

-You are called by God to counsel others (2 Corinthians 9:8; Hebrews 10:24-25).

The Lord says , 'I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you and watch over you" (PSALM 32:8).

WHAT IS YOUR MAJOR RESPONSIBILITY WHEN GIVING COUNSEL?
For your counseling to have maximum effectiveness, you must live in total depen­dence on Christ, seeking His will. Jesus said, "I am the vine; you are the branches. If a man remains in me and I in him, he will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing" John 15:5).

The Seven Steps of Spiritual Wisdom

With a heart of humility, realize:

1. The solutions are not your solutions John 14:26).
2. The self-sufficiency you lean on should be replaced with Christ-sufficiency (John 15:5).
3. The Spirit of Christ is your counselor, enabling you to counsel with truth (John 16:13).
4. The sinful person should never be confronted with condemnation (1 Peter 3:15-16
5. The success of your counseling is not dependent on you knowing all the answers (Proverbs 3:5-6).
6. The Scriptures will light the way as you help others walk out of darkness (Psalm 119:105).
7. The secret of victory over sin is relying on the power of the indwelling presence of Christ (Philippians 4:13).

WHAT ARE YOUR GOALS WHEN GIVING BIBLICAL COUNSEL?

The more you know God's Word, the more you will know God's will. When someone comes to you with a problem, first ask yourself, Has God already spoken :specifically about this in His Word? If so, what has He said? If not, is there a general biblical principle that needs to be considered? The greater your dependence on the Word of God, the wiser you will be. Psalm 119:105 says, "Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path."

As a Biblical Counselor who is sincerely serving Christ your will want to:

-Help those who are off course get on a "correction course" to move toward wholeness and spiritual maturity. The Bible says, "If one of you should wander from the truth and someone should bring him back, remember this: Whoever turns a sinner from the error of his way will save him from death and cover over a multitude of sins" (James 5:19­20).

-Lead an unbeliever into a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. Jesus said, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it" (Matthew 16:24-25).

Present wisdom from God's Word in order to enable strugglers to live in victory. "Listen to advice and accept instruction, and in the end you will be wise" (Proverbs 19:20).

PRACTICAL COUNSELING: How Do You Do It

Be wise in how you walk through the doors of opportunity God brings your way. You may spend many days, weeks, or months helping the heart of one in need, or you may sow only a few seeds in the life of someone who briefly crosses your path. Pray regularly that God will direct both your words and actions. Colossians 4:5-6 says, "Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone."

1. Prepare the Physical Setting

-Provide a private, relaxing place to talk (safe for all parties involved). -Eliminate distractions (radio, TV, music, other voices, or annoying noises). -Prevent interruptions (hold phone calls, activate the answering machine, utilize a "Do Not Disturb" sign, place a notepad by the door for mes­sages). -Avoid physical barriers (don't sit behind a desk unless you need to appear firmly authoritative to someone who is belligerent or abusive). -Change lighting to reduce glare (adjust blinds, curtains, or overhead lights as needed). -Keep counseling aids handy (Bible, paper, pen, and referral phone num­bers). -Place facial tissues and drinking water within reach (replenish prior to meeting).

"The wisdom of the prudent is to give thought to their ways"
. (PROVERBS 14:8).

2. Promote Personal Nonverbal Nurture

-Smile upon greeting the person (a friendly face can disarm a fearful dis­position).

-Shake hands or use another appropriate greeting (human touch conveys warmth and care).

-Situate chairs in close proximity (if at a 90-degree angle, turn your body to face the other person).

-Slant your body slightly forward (leaning forward signifies, ''I'm inter­ested in what you are saying").

-Sustain good eye contact (refuse to be distracted-if necessary, move to another location).

-Show an occasional nod of the head (this simple movement signifies acceptance versus rejection).

-Stay open and approachable (don't sit with arms folded or fists clenched. Folded arms signify, ''I'm not convinced you want help").

3. Probe for the Real Problem

How to Get Started

-Call the person by name-several times:
"Hi, David! Come on in. "

-Don't engage in small talk. Off-the-subject comments delay getting to the point and may decrease the person's willingness to be vulnerable. -Ask a direct question... "How can I help you?" or "What would you like us to talk about?" Answer: "How can I get her to stay with me... to be reconciled?" "Do you want to be a man of integrity?"

-Realize, the presenting problem (what someone assumes is the cause of the trouble) is very often not the real problem. If the real problem relates to a lack of trustworthiness due to a lack of truthfulness, probe with perti­nent questions to gain insight and understanding.
"The purposes of a man’s heart are deep waters, but a man of understanding draws them out" (PROVERBS 20:5).

How to Probe into the Past

-Ask why the problem exists...

"What has she actually said is the reason for the trouble?"
"She says I lie."
"Do you ever twist the truth?"
"Only sometimes."
"Does she say this is a major problem?"

"Yes."

"Yes."

-Ask background questions regarding family, home, school, dating, and work. "David, what was it like growing up in your home?" "We all walked on eggshells. Mother had a lot of fear."

Explore the impact of significant people (such as parents, siblings, other relatives, and friends).

"What messages did you receive about you from what your father said and did?"
"It's like he said, 'You are nothing. You are a zero.'''
"How did that make you feel?"

"What was your mother afraid of?"

-Listen to what is not shared. If one parent is not mentioned at all, ask about that parent.
"What was your relationship with your father?" "He was cold and harsh."

-Ask for the earliest memories of that habit.

"When was the first time you remember lying? What caused you to lie back then?"
"If I upset Dad he would hurt my Mom, so I would lie to keep him from getting angry."

-Encourage further talk.

"Could you tell me more?" "He would threaten divorce..." "Go on...." "He'd take everything..." "M-m-m...." ".. .leaving us with nothing."

-Primarily ask open-ended questions that cannot be answered with yes or no. "David, when are you most tempted to lie today?" "When someone could become upset with me."

-4. Pose the Question, Why Do We Do What We Don't Want to Do?

Those who are stuck in the ditch of negative habits (such as lying) can lose all hope of personal change. They don't know what to do, much less why they do what they do. The apostle Paul expressed what we have all experienced: "What I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do-this I keep on doing" (Romans 7:19).

We have all been created with three God-given inner needs: love, significance, and security:
Love-to know that someone is unconditionally committed to our best inter­est (John:15:12

Significance-to know that our lives have meaning and purpose (Psalm 57:2)

Security-to feel accepted and have a sense of belonging (Proverbs 14:26)
5. Present the Ultimate Need-meeter

Why did God give us these deep inner needs, knowing that "people fail people"? (For example, some parents are harsh, cruel, and abusive.) While every person has been created with these three inner needs, no person is able to meet our three needs.2 Realize that if one person could meet all our needs, we wouldn't need God!

The Lord planned that He would be our Need-meeter. The apostle Paul revealed this truth by exclaiming, "What a wretched man 1am! Who will rescue me from this body of death?" Then he answered his own question in a strong way: "Jesus Christ our Lord!" (Romans 7:24-25).

All along, the Lord planned to meet our deepest needs for...

Love-He says, "I have loved you with an everlasting love" (Jeremiah 31:3)
Significance-He says, "I know the plans 1have for you...plans to give you
hope and a future" (Jeremiah 29:11)
Security-He says, "Never will I leaveyou; never will I forsakeyou" (Hebrews 13:5)

Sometimes the Lord will meet certain needs by Himself, and other times He will use other people as an extension of His care and compassion.

Congratulations! You have completed Lesson 5. Are your ready to review for the test? The next lesson will be a recap of this module and allow you to take your first test!

GO TO LESSON 6